Dwelling on - obsessing over - being unable to move forward - it is easy to play armchair quarterback and say things like, "Oh, get over that already." or "In the grand scheme of things things could be a lot worse." or "I don't see what the big deal is anyway."
Yes, I agree that negative attitudes are not easy. Absolutely no arguement from me on that point. But we are all a complicated emotional stew of a wide range of emotions and experiences. There are no one-size-fits-all answers to navigating our way through life. Even our assessment of situations that we honestly think is impartial is influenced by everything we have experienced.
I think (obsess?) a great deal about this particular subject. I mean, we all have 'those' people that are so difficult to spend very much time in the presence of because they are so, so negative. Downright depressing, truth be told.
I am that "Debbie Downer" in someone else's life? What if people groan inwardly when they see me coming? What if others dread certain subjects being broached when I am in the conversation because, oh no now she will never shut up?
Perhaps being a kinder me is partly about realizing that my parents were right, that the world does not revolve around me. Perhaps I need to work harder at active listening and practice less oversharing.
Maybe, just maybe, the affirming life I want to live really is all up to me.