Monday, January 23, 2012

I Suppose *this* is 'Why It Has To Matter'

On the 13th of this month I wrote about the LGBT community and acceptance. I am very naive in some ways, because it has always puzzled me that in such advanced technological and intellectual times as these, when information is available in copious amount from a plethora of sources, people still cling to what are in my view outdated and inherently dangerous ideas.

I am reproducing here, in entirety, a comment that was made on this particular blog-post, and then I am going to delete the comment. I do know the person who made the comment, and want to assure them I am not deleting their comment to try to stifle their opinion. I firmly believe in the right of free speech, individual thought and opinion. I abhor censorship. I am deleting the comment so they will not be subjected to any sort of retaliatory discourse because I do not want my blog to be used for such.

I am quoting the comment, only editing out identifying information, because to me it illustrates the struggles and roadblocks facing a vital part of our society. Any errors in spelling, grammar or punctuation have not been corrected.

oh ellen this is a subject dangerous for me. I truely believe a person's sexual behavior is learned, just like being a pedophile, a race car driver, a school teacher or a farmer. I try not to judge anyone but I don't care for skinheads because they advocate hate and I don't care for gays because they advocate that deviant sexual behavior should be out in the open and not behind closed doors. I have known many gays and even though I liked them as a person I don't agree with public discussion of the behavior. Life ia like a theme park, with many different people, there to enjoy the experience, having to pay for admittance, traveling in different groups some having fun -others not. Gays are like those riding bungee jumping rides seeking the big thrill. Drama and trauma, crazy daredevils. Please don't be angry with me I just don't want children to be taught this is normal behavior

Oh, my how this comment concerns me.  On so many levels. I have known people in the LGBT community for all of my adult life. I, and you, probably know more people in these categories than is realized, because of the type of attitude represented in the above comment. I honestly am at a quandary as to what to say. Not speaking out is tacit agreement, condoning what I truly feel is a dangerous attitude. Opening a contentious dialogue is not my desire either, because tempers flare and defenses are drawn and hurts are inflicted.

As stated, I do know this person, and know they read my blog on a regular basis. So I am going to make a personal appeal to them. Please reconsider you thoughts on this matter, and research some of your statements. Get to know a gay or lesbian couple who are in a committed relationship. Search out a transgender person in your area, see them not as a freak of nature but as a warm, loving, caring human with obstacles to face in life merely because of who they are you and I cannot even begin to comprehend. 

"Deviant" behavior of a sexual nature is not confined to the LBGT community, and is, in my opinion, a very subjective term. When we teach children a narrow concept of acceptable behavior, and their nature, experiences and personality lead them outside the boundaries on an individual basis, we are effectively removing from them the support and love they need from us to develop as productive members of their cohort (In statistics and demography, a cohort is a group of subjects who have shared a particular time together during a particular time span ).

I guess I really should stop here, because I truly want white owl at midnight to be a place of calm and reason, and I am walking a narrow line right now.
In life, every moment of every day is a teachable and learning moment. This has been one for me, and I am going to watch more closely the few comments made on my blog posts.


  1. I think it's amazing how both you and Mary have became so vocal about these topics.

    1. Brett, I love my LGBT friends, and abhor bigotry and unwarranted hatred. I speak up for those I love, wish I could do more.

    2. Oh ellen, I had hoped that my opinion would not be misunderstood, misjudged and I certainly am not inviting any arguements. I don't dislike people that are gay I just get upset when it is pushed in my face that I am to accept and condone behavior I find distasteful. I am so glad my dad married my mom and not some guy. Also, I don't care for people who advocate crime, murder, stealing, lying, adultery, disrespect to our parents or praying to false gods. In my heart I hope everyone finds their path to happiness and good health. Please don't make excuses for me just because I don't like, rather abhor the thought of sexual behavior of a gay person. I would rather they kept the information to themselves. I said nothing against transgender people and I do know some gays and they are not in commited relationships. I am married but do not discuss my sexual actions with others, I am sure they would say TMI. You did not read carefully my comment and I am sure that you will assume I equate crime, stealing etc. with being gay and I am not, these are just behaviors that I find are being more acceptable to the general public, maybe because of tv. Love you and enjoy your blog and once you read my opinion you can delete for it was only meant for your information and not an appeal to maime, destroy, hate or hurt anyone.

    3. We shall agree to disagree, then, and I will leave the comment as stands. Your original comment was carefully read, and I carefully considered before I responded.